I have been having a really hard time lately with attention. I have always wanted people to laugh at me cause I gotta admit that I can be pretty dang funny.. ;) that is now gone, people would put me on the spot, I would get all red in my chest and then I would feel the pressure like make me laugh and then I could usually pull that off because I love to see people happy and smiling the sound of laughter is my favorite sound. ( Hunter had the best laugh) . I now get looked at really weird kinda like I'm a puppy or like I am on display., is she going to break down at any moment.
I have never liked negative Attention on me, I almost feel like I need to hug them and say "dude its gonna be OK". I don't know its just weird.. I do not like it so much. I'm pretty sure it is just peoples way of having nothing to say there biggest fear for there children or anyone I'm living it.
here's to you people..... This sucks !!!!!
I would not wish it upon anyone ever. But we can't change it.. We can only do better everyday to be strong for my, our Amazing HUNTER..
ps..
I might just hug you if you look at me weird and I am so not a hugger!!! :)
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE
I am glad you mentioned this. I imagine it is so hard to relate to anyone right now. I know I am one of those awkward people that love you so much and wish I could say just the perfect thing to make you feel better for even one second....but there is no perfect thing.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could have an awkward hug...I wish I could hang out with you and talk. I really want to make a trip up there soon.
I know I have said it before, but I am soooooooooo happy that you are writing all of this down.
Love Love Love YOU!!!!!!
I can't even begin to tell you how much I admire you and your strength. You always had it growing up. People would gravitate toward you because of it and your amazing ability to put anyone at ease and make them laugh. Even now. . . when you have the weight of this on your shoulders you are looking at giving awkward hugs and making people laugh. I am so glad that I can be in touch with you again. I am at a loss for words and there have been so many times that I have gone to leave a comment but nothing seems right or worthy to be expressed. I too, wish that I have the perfect thing to say to comfort you and make you feel better. Your happiness is my biggest wish and a constant in my mind. I wish that I was a better friend, someone who had the right thing to say or do to make you happy. I wish we could be young again, when the only biggest concern we had was how we were going to pay for the slurpees. I wish I could buy you a slurpee. I love you sweet friend. I love the person you were then and I admire the person you are now. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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